- Thou shalt start with thyself.
As parents, set the example so your children have something to follow. You can't set rules and regulations and then disobey them yourself. - Thou shalt be more concerned about relationships than rules.
Jesus said that He came to fulfill the law (Matt 5:17), so don't do away with the boundaries, rules and regulations, because they're necessary. But you must give love and build relationships with your children. - Thou shalt impart the faith.
Deuteronomy 6:5-9 talks about how we're to sit down with our children and talk to them about the Word. We're to share the Word with them as we go throughout the house, and we're to write the Word over the doorposts of our homes.You shall love the Lord you God with all your heart, with all your soul, and with all your might.
And these words, which I command you today shall be in your heart; you shall teach them diligently to your children, and shall talk of them when you sit in your house, when you walk by the way, when you lie down, and when you rise up.
You shall bind them as a sign on your hand, and they shall be as frontlets between your eyes. You shall write them on the doorposts of your house and on your gates.
(Deut. 6:5-9) - Thou shalt learn to listen.
Most parents need to work on this one! James 1:19 says, "...let every man be swift to hear, slow to speak, slow to wrath."
It takes effort to listen to children and teenagers, to get down on their level, to be able to relate to them and really listen to what they're saying, but it's very important to them. - Thou shalt spend time with thy children.
God dealt with me when my daughter was a baby that time with my children was not lost time. It was invested time, and it was quality time.
I always had the idea that it wasn't really that important. I thought what was important was the ministry, but God began to reorient my priorities to include time with my family. - Thou shalt acknowledge thy faults as a parent.
James 5:16 says, "Confess your trespasses to one another, and pray for one another, that you may be healed." Be quick to humble yourself and ask forgiveness of your children when you've made a mistake. - Thou shalt keep a sense of humor.
A good laugh will set you free from pent-up emotions.
After we discipline our children, we love them and then say, "You'd better put on a happy face." The children can't help but smile, and then we laugh.
Sometimes we laugh about things and they don't even know what we're laughing about, but they'll start laughing and then we all get tickled. Laughter is like medicine. - Thou shalt treat thy children equally.
Children are all different, and as parents, we should never compare them. - Thou shalt use discipline.
- Thou shalt know when to let go.
Sometimes parents tend to overprotect their children. Sometimes parents feel like they've got to be every place the children are, which is a spirit of fear.
There's a point where you have to let go and trust God, believing that the training you've instilled in them will preserve and keep them.
It's so important to pray and intercede for your children. We've had many examples where parents have either seen into the Spirit or were quickened by the Spirit to pray for their children. Because of prayer, the enemy was stopped from destroying or coming against their lives.
(Michael Davies, "Ten Commandments for Parents," Associated Church Press, American Tract Society, P.O. Box 462008, Garland, TX 75046.)
Excerpt permission granted by Harrison House Publishers
Billy Joe Daugherty was founder and pastor of Victory Christian Center in Tulsa, Oklahoma. He was also the founder of Victory Christian School, Victory Bible Institute and Victory World Missions Training Center.
