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As a single parent, the goal in discipline and correction should be character development: training children and young people in the principles of godly character.

High on your list of what you are working to instill in your children and teenagers should be the fear of the Lord. We are living in a society today that, for the most part, doesn't have a reverential fear of God. Many things are done without a sense of reprisal or judgment. There's no sense of honor, holiness, or integrity.

As a result, lives are wrecked, because the wages of sin are death, not only in eternity, but here and now. Sin has a penalty right here on earth.

People are being destroyed because they don't know how to fear God. The fear of the Lord is to depart from evil. It is the beginning of wisdom. This must be instilled in children.

Children must be taught to respect authority. They be taught hard work, responsibility, faithfulness, integrity, and honesty, as opposed to stealing, cheating, and lying.

When you punish without instilling godly principles into your children's lives, they may not even know why they're being punished.

An effective part of character development in children is the reinforcement of the positives in their lives. Many parents, with an appropriate motive of correcting and bringing proper training, get off course by faultfinding rather than accentuating the positives.

Perfectionism will cause bitterness in children, because children aren't perfect. If you could see a video of how you acted when you were growing up, it might help your memory!

You need to make allowances for the age of your children. They can't be compared with someone who is five or six years older. Find reasons to praise them in what they are doing right in their lives.

Today, many children and teenagers are under oppression, because they have a barrage of accusations against them day in and day out. You can change that by speaking that which is good. It's like inflating a balloon.

As the old song says, "Accentuate the positive, eliminate the negative, latch on to the affirmative, and don't mess with Mr. In-Between!" As a single parent, this doesn't mean you won't deal with negatives, but try to find something good in each of your children and make something out of it. Let praise come from your lips to your children.

You may not be able to select the profession your children choose, but you can determine the kind of character they will have in their lives. You can instill in them honesty, integrity, respect for authority, and obedience. Then no matter what profession they pursue, those qualities will benefit them.

Shake off fear concerning the destiny of your children. Build your faith to believe, speak, and see that they're going to make it, victoriously, walking in obedience to God.

You should have minimum goals for your children to be saved, filled with the Holy Spirit, involved in a local church, and fruitful and productive for the Kingdom of God.

The more you want for your children, the more you must be willing to invest in them. It will take prayer, time, and faith. With children, love is spelled T-I-M-E!

Men have often made a god of their work so they have little or no time for their families. Women have also allowed work and the desire to make more money to keep them from being with their children.

Single parents have no choice. As a parent (weather married or single), you have a calling to raise your children, to train them, and to put inside of them what needs to be instilled in them. A new car this year may not be as important as your children serving God 25 years down the road.

We live in a materialistic society that has pressed people for more and more things. One day those things will be gone, but when your children rise up and bless you because you invested time in them, that will be worth all the things that you may have sacrificed.

Many men are working two and three jobs with extended hours just for extra "things." The family might prefer to have Dad home a few more hours! You should never sacrifice the Word or your family in order to make money. Put the Word and prayer first, your family second, then work and study.

This is an hour when you must make an extra effort to build your family on the power of God and watch with the anointing of the Holy Spirit against the enemy.

You have authority in the realm of the Spirit to pray for your children and stand on the Word of God against the works of the enemy in their lives.

Source: Building Stronger Marriages by Billy Joe Daugherty.
Excerpt permission granted by Harrison House Publishers

Author Biography

Billy Joe Daugherty
Web site: Victory Christian Center
Billy Joe Daugherty was founder and pastor of Victory Christian Center in Tulsa, Oklahoma. He was also the founder of Victory Christian School, Victory Bible Institute and Victory World Missions Training Center.

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