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"And Adam knew Eve his wife; and she conceived, and bare Cain, and said, I have gotten a man from the Lord" (Gen. 4:1).

The first few words in this verse tell us part of God's plan:

"And Adam knew Eve his wife...."

When the Bible says Adam knew her, it doesn't mean he just knew who she was or knew her address. It means he knew her as his wife. In other words, he had sexual relations with her.

God is the Author of sex. He created it and developed it. Sex was God's idea, not man's. In and of itself, sex isn't dirty and it isn't perverted; but it can be. There have been some dirty things made out of it, and there are limits to its use.

A Husband Is To Be With His Wife
Notice this Scripture says, "And Adam knew Eve his wife...." His wife is the only one Adam was supposed to know sexually.

God's plan has a certain order to it: He wants each man to be joined sexually with his own wife, and no other person. An unmarried man should not know any woman sexually until after he has exchanged marriage vows with her.

Notice that Eve gave proper credit to God as the Source of her first child. The Scripture says: "And Adam knew Eve his wife; and she conceived, and bare Cain, and said, I have gotten a man from the Lord" (Gen. 4:1).

Once again, God is the One Who gives life. Man and woman physically come together in the sexual union, but it is God Who puts life into their child. Therefore, only God has the right to take that life.

Even in the New Testament, we have laid out for us what God's plan is for mankind, how He intended for everything to operate in a certain order. God has an order for everything, with everything being in its proper place.

Sex Is Not a Weapon!
I want us to look at some verses in First Corinthians, chapter 7:
Now concerning the things whereof ye wrote unto me: It is good for a man not to touch a woman. Nevertheless, to avoid fornication, let every man have his own wife, and let every woman have her own husband.

Let the husband render unto the wife due benevolence: and likewise also the wife unto the husband. The wife hath not power of her own body, but the husband: and likewise also the husband hath not power of his own body, but the wife.

Defraud ye not one the other, except it be with consent for a time, that ye may give yourselves to fasting and prayer; and come together again, that Satan tempt you not for your incontinency [or lack of self-control]
(1 Cor. 7:1-5)
Now I want us to look at this passage of Scripture from The Amplified Bible, beginning with verse 2:
But because of the temptation to impurity and to avoid immorality, let each [man] have his own wife and let each [woman] have her own husband.

The husband should give to his wife her conjugal rights [meaning the right to have sex with her husband] - goodwill, kindness and what is due her as his wife; and likewise the wife to her husband. For the wife does not have [exclusive] authority and control over her own body, but the husband [has his rights]; likewise also the husband does not have [exclusive] authority and control over his body, but the wife [has her rights].

Do not refuse and deprive and defraud each other (of your due marital rights), except perhaps by mutual consent for a time, that you may devote yourselves unhindered to prayer. But afterwards resume marital relations, lest Satan tempt you [to sin] through your lack of restraint of sexual desire.
(1 Cor. 7:1-5)
Now it was, and always has been, God's plan that a man and woman be married. Then, as now, they are to have one another as husband and wife. Note verse 2 from the King James Version:
Let every man have his own wife, and let every woman have her own husband.
(1 Cor. 7:2)
God intended for a man to have only his wife and for a woman to have only her husband - period.

It was never God's plan for man and woman to use sex as a weapon against each other. Regardless of whether or not you are saved, for you to use sex as a weapon by withholding it from your spouse is to be out of God's plan, out of God's will, out of God's Word. That means it's wrong!

Sex Involves More Than Procreation
God intended for a husband and his wife to join themselves together physically, but not just for procreation purposes.

Remember, in the Old Testament God told the man and woman to be fruitful and multiply (Gen. 1:28). But in First Corinthians, chapter 7, the apostle Paul in talking about the marriage union did not mention anything about procreation or about the couple's need to have children. He was clearly describing the significance of sexual relations between a husband and wife.

Now this is important, because people can get themselves into trouble. Either the husband or the wife could end up getting involved in an extramarital affair if their spouse has refused to fulfill their sexual needs.

The Obligation of Sex Between Husband and Wife
Note what it says in verse 4 of First Corinthians, chapter 7: "The wife hath not power of her own body, but the husband: and likewise also the husband hath not power of his own body, but the wife."

Recently an article in the newspaper talked about how sex can help to cure the headache and that it is healthy for the body. I happen to believe that, not because I'm a man, but because I have studied the Bible. Anything designed by God is good.

"The wife hath not power of her own body, but the husband..." (v. 4).

This means the wife has an obligation to involve herself sexually with her husband when he desires it.

Verse 4 continues by saying: "...and likewise also the husband hath not power of his own body, but the wife."

This means the husband should not come dragging in and say to his wife, "I'm tired; leave me alone." He has the obligation to perform sexually for her, just as he would expect her to give herself sexually to him. That's God's intention. It's the will of God, and people get into trouble when they step out of God's will.

As verse 5 says: "Defraud ye not one the other, except it be with consent for a time, that ye may give yourselves to fasting and prayer...."

So there are times of fasting and prayer when the husband and wife should not involve themselves with sexual relations. But after that time, it says they are to...come together again, that Satan tempt you not for your incontinency [or lack of self-control].

So God intended for man and woman to experience sex, but only after marriage. Within the marital union, God intended for sex to be not just for the procreation of children but as a way to enjoy each other. That is God's plan for man.

When things are done in proper order the way God has set them up, then blessings will come.

Now we are talking about God's plan for man that was from the very beginning when, as Scripture says, Adam knew Eve his wife. God intended for that to be.

Source: What On Earth Are We Here For? by Keith Butler
Excerpt permission granted by Harrison House Publishers

Author Biography

Keith Butler
Web site: Keith Butler
 
Keith Butler has been an ordained minister since 1974. He is a graduate of the University of Michigan and holds diplomas from Canada Christian College and Rhema Bible Training Center. He serves in ministry with the support of his lovely wife, Pastor Deborah L. Butler, and their children: Pastor Andre Butler (granddaughters Alexis, Angela, and April), Pastor MiChelle Ferguson and husband Pastor Lee (grandson Lucas), and Minister Kristina Jenkins and husband Pastor Joel (grandsons Andrew and Austin, and granddaughter Alyssa).
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