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For whatever is born of God overcomes the world. And this is the victory that has overcome the world—our faith.  
(1 John 5:4-5)
I have always been fascinated about the fact that a ship that weighs thousands of metric tons can float on water and not sink. This is as a result of two fundamental qualities: the hollow shape of the ship, combined with its ability to prevent water from coming into the ship. The ship will sail as long as the water outside the ship does not get into the ship. It is interesting that a ship can only sail on water that will cause it great harm if it gets into the ship. It is also interesting that most ship wrecks don’t occur at shore. They occur when the ship has left shore and set sail to its destination.

Relationships are similar to ships, particularly marital relationships. As long as you don’t allow the junk from the world to get into your relationship and stay in, you have what it takes to sail through any storm. The true test of a ship's engineering is its ability to sail through a storm and not sink. This ability always reflects well on the manufacturer of the ship. When you overcome storms in life, particularly in your marriage, it also generates praise to God.

I see genuine people who love each other get married only for their marriage to crash once it sets sail. The reality is that your love for each other alone does not guarantee success in marriage or that you will overcome storms in your relationships. Likewise the captain’s love for his ship is not enough to ensure it will overcome storms at sea. Your love for each should fuel you to take active measures that will ensure your marriage will stand the storms of life.

I see a lot of Christians who love God, who believe in God and make a great deal of sacrifice for Him, only to experience wreckage in their marriage. Storms do happen in marriage whether you are a Christian or not. They happen not because you married the wrong spouse, as is the default thinking of most couples, or that your spouse is the source of the storm.

Storms will happen in marriage and how you navigate as a couple is vital for you to overcome the storm. How you react to storms is the difference between people who overcome and those who don’t. This is why two different couples can face the same storm—say financial hardship or difficulty in sexual intimacy—and get different outcomes. While the storm can cause one couple to get divorced, it can cause the other couple to grow closer once they overcome the storm.

Ways to Reduce Storms in Marriage
Be sensitive to your spouse.
Storms don’t just appear; they usually give signs or signals. As the captain of a ship, your ability to pay attention to the environmental and climatic condition of your path is vital to the lives of your crew and the success of your journey.

Sensitivity is essential to the success of any marriage. Be sensitive to each other’s needs and desires. Understand the atmospheric or climatic conditions in your marriage and be proactive in diffusing pressure points. That way the pressure points do not generate enough momentum to become storms that can potentially wreck the relationship. Communication and paying attention to your spouse are good places to start building sensitivity toward your spouse.

Your relationship is unique.
This is one area where most couples fall short. No two relationships are the same. Imagine a ship comparing itself to a submarine which attempts to go under water. You need to study your spouse and relate to them based on who they are and not based on general assumptions. Study each other’s strengths, development areas, likes, dislikes, goals, dreams and so on. Find out what works for you and your spouse and consciously ensure that you apply it.

Couples fall short in this area when they compare themselves with others and to replicate what works well for others. In some cases their intensions are good; however, couples need to understand that no two relationships are the same. Each relationship has its own unique DNA and as such couples must find out what works for them. Couples must tailor things to their unique family.

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Author Biography

Toyosi Erogbogbo
Web site: Your Marriage Journey
Uthman Oluwatoyosi Erogbogbo (fondly called Toyosi) is a trained finance professional with a growing passion to see more Godly marriages in our world today. Toyosi holds the strong conviction that society flourishes to the extent to which the family and marriages prosper. He is passionate about helping singles who desire marriage; make the transition into a relationship that culminates in a fruitful marriage union.

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