When you believe that you are special and that God created you, took time to form you and that He is pleased with you—then all other situations are small compared to that.
When I was in junior high, I went to a friend's birthday party where it was decided by the group to watch the first Freddy Krueger film, "A Nightmare on Elm Street 1."

So, there we were, huddled around the TV stuffed into a fairly small living room, eating popcorn and drinking sodas. Being the clown of the group, I made jokes throughout the movie—not to be funny, but instead to keep myself from screaming in terror.

When the movie was over, I jumped up, excited that it was over. I was mortified when the birthday boy smiled and held up "Freddy Krueger 2" and we all sat down to view another stinking horror flick.

To make matters worse, my parents, who rarely ever went out, were attending a cast party after a play they had both participated in which meant that I would be left alone in the house late on a Friday night. In a house that sat up in the woods.

Alone.

Alone with Freddy Krueger....

Real And Present Danger?
As soon as my parents drove out of the driveway, I snuggled up on the couch watching any comedy I could find on TV. Clutching my BB gun and an old bayonet, I was convinced Freddy was going to kill me, or at least scratch me real good.

I also believed that a BB gun and a big knife could keep him at bay. None of which was true, but it was to me. I sat there scared for hours until my parents returned home.

Was I ever in a any real danger? No. Did I believe I was in danger? Yes. I perceived that Freddy Krueger was going to crash through our picture window and slash me to pieces (of course, he would have had a few BB's in him, too).

The perception was so strong, so real, that I acted on it. My behavior was a direct result of what I perceived. I was in the misperception dungeon, trapped by my own (incorrect) views of the situation.

Perception vs. Reality
For every event that occurs to a person, an automatic thought, which is influenced greatly by perceptions, pops into the mind, which produces a feeling. That feeling causes an action or behavior.

For example, if someone calls me a derogatory name, an automatic thought may pop into my mind, such as "What a jerk!" Anger may also fill my body. A normal behavior might be to yell back or gesticulate wildly (yeah, say that five times fast).

But in this example, the event is the person calling me a name. This event is neither good nor bad, it is not a free moral agent and is not, therefore, out to get me. This event provokes an automatic thought ("What a jerk!"), which produces a feeling (anger). This anger causes me to yell.

Notice that perceptions filter the automatic thoughts. My perception of the event is the cause of the thought. My perception in this example is that I perceive that I am indeed what that guy called me, or at least there must be some truth to what he said. If not, then I would not have reacted the way I did, right?

That perception is created by a core belief deep within me. The core belief is something like "Nobody likes me." Because I believe this to be true, when something reminds me of this belief, my perception colors my thoughts and feelings, hence my poor behavior.

That poor behavior incites people to react to me in negative ways. Those negative behaviors directed toward me are new events to which I will react—and so on...and so on....

The cycle continues until it is broken. To break this cycle, new perceptions and core beliefs must be formed.

In the last example, if my core belief is that I am likable, then my perceptions will color my automatic thoughts. So, when that man calls me a name, my perception will be something like, "He obviously doesn't know me," and my automatic thought will probably be, "He must be in a bad mood."

My feeling will then be one of apathy resulting in my walking away and ignoring him. Same event, different behavior and/or outcome.

When an event "gets your goat," here are some things you can do to stay out of the misperception dungeon:

1. Get the facts and the truth—What really happened? What was the event or events? Go to reliable sources.
2. Know the truth—What has typically happened? Does this person normally act like this or say such things?
3. Know the Truth—Know what the Bible says, particularly about you. Do you believe God created you and formed you?
4. Go to the person directly—Don't believe second-hand info, go directly to the person and find out what was (or was not) said.
5. Assume the best—This is hard, but believing the best will prevent many misperceptions.
6. Check your own intentions—What do you really think when things happen? What are your feelings? Check them against what you know to be true or the Truth.
7. Discover your own core beliefs—Are you valuable? Do you have worth just because of who you are?

The best kind of perception is that of knowing that God loves you! When you believe that you are special and that God created you, took time to form you and that He is pleased with you, that you have worth just because He made you—then all other situations are small compared to that.

If this is something you do not hold as a core belief, then I invite you to start by making Jesus Christ your personal Lord if you have not done so. Read scriptures regarding His love toward you. Meditate on Psalm 139:13-18; Jer. 29:11; and Rev. 4:12.

Walk out of the misperception dungeon and into the light of freedom.

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