Dear Lynnette,
I would like your opinion about this. My husband and I have been married for forty years. He has always been a person who wants me or someone else to praise him for everything he does. This isn’t normal. What would you suggest is the problem he is having? Even though we have children, he still wants to be the center of attention. He is an only child. Maybe you can enlighten me and others who may be going through the same situation.
There could be several reasons for your husband’s actions. As an only child, he most likely grew up being the center of attention and became very used to that.
When children grow up in a family where there are several siblings, they quickly learn to share their parents’ attention, whereas an only child is not always exposed to this kind of interaction.
Wanting to be praised continually can also be a sign of low self-esteem. Perhaps your husband doesn’t feel he has attained the level of success he desires, and he deals with these feelings by placing emphasis on himself and by wanting to be praised.
Or perhaps he doesn’t feel he measures up to your expectations of him as a husband and father.
One of the basic needs of a man is admiration. Praise and admiration have a powerful effect on all of us. Unfortunately, as husbands and wives, we have a tendency to voice criticism rather than praise of our spouse.
In teaching on marriage, I tell husbands and wives that we often take our spouse for granted. We need to praise each other on a daily basis for what some might consider minor and insignificant things.
I encourage you to communicate your concerns to your spouse. Let him know how much you love him and that you are proud of him. I believe that as you reassure him of your love and appreciation, his need to constantly be praised will diminish.
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Passionate, joyful, and vibrant . . . these words best describe Lynette Hagin. Lynette is an author, teacher, and conference speaker and host. She serves as the Director of Rhema Bible Training College and General Manager of Kenneth Hagin Ministries. She also assists her husband, Kenneth W. Hagin, in pastoring Rhema Bible Church.
Her positive, practical, and often humorous presentation touches people from all walks of life. Lynette is committed to helping people succeed in life by sharing a life-changing, powerful message—“You can make it!”
Lynette’s leadership has been instrumental in shaping the lives of thousands of women through her annual Kindle the Flame® Women’s Conference. Many more lives are touched through Rhema Praise, a weekly television broadcast, and Rhema for Today, a weekday radio program, both of which Lynette cohosts with her husband, Kenneth. They also conduct Living Faith Crusades around the world. Lynette exemplifies the woman of balance—balancing womanhood, motherhood, and ministry as she encourages and inspires others to do the same. She is ordained through Rhema Ministerial Association International.