“But if we hope for that we see not, then do we with patience wait for it” (Rom. 8:25).
Every relationship is going to take some time, but it will take a little less time if the two people have similar upbringings, because it’s easier to understand what makes him or her tick.
Suppose, for example, you came from a divorced home and I came from a two-parent home. I’ve been happy every day of my life and you’ve never seen a happy day. Then guess what? You’re going to make sure I don’t see any more happy days – because you don’t know what happiness is. It is imperative to know yourself before you can bring someone else into your life.
Premarital counseling is very important. But a lot of times people don’t seek it because they’re afraid that we’re going to point out something that they know isn’t right, and they don’t want us to find out about it.
Their attitude is, I love her; She loves me. We’re getting married. Then they do the “Vegas” run. Three weeks later they’re sitting in our office. They thought they could work it out, but they couldn’t.
Listen, if you think you can work a problem out, then work it out before you get married.
The silliest thing in the world is for people to get married without counseling, especially when it’s available to them. We want people to locate the problem areas before they get married. We feel that if a couple comes to us for premarital counseling, it’s our responsibility to make sure they know as much about each other as possible.
For example, we’ve had couples set a date to get married and their divorces weren’t even final. We’ve had people get married and then find out that the spouse is head over hills in debt. We’ve even had couples get married knowing they could not have children, but did not tell the spouse for fear of losing the relationship.
We make sure people know that before they say, “I do,” they’ll have the opportunity to say, “I don’t and I won’t.” We also require a couple to date at least a year before counseling. We want to see if they’re really serious about the relationship. After all, compared to the rest of your life, a year or two is not long.
Develop a strong foundation for marriage through the Word of God. This way you are sure to have a successful marriage and family.
Scripture Reference: Genesis 8:22; Habakkuk 2:3
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Pastor Deborah L. Butler is the first lady Word of Faith International Christian Centre located in Southfield, Michigan where she serves in ministry with her husband, Bishop Keith A. Butler.
Pastor Deborah is a licensed and ordained minister of the Gospel. Her encouraging, yet down-to-earth teaching imparts wisdom from the Word of God into all that hear her speak. One of Pastor Butler’s many duties is serving as the Director of the Women of Virtue Ministry. Pastor Deborah is often called to travel to other ministries to teach and admonish women to walk in the wisdom of God, and to experience peace in every area of their lives.