Recently, I wrote about what I believe is the key to effective problem-solving. In fact, I called it solving the problem before the problem. That key is attitude. I believe that a positive attitude in the face of a problem affects how you approach it, which can set you up for a positive solution.
Today, I want to discuss another area where attitude makes a huge difference: communication.
As a communicator, I spend a lot of time thinking about what I’m going to say to help people. I prepare as much as possible to make sure my words add value to others. And yet, I am deeply aware that no matter how much I craft the words of a talk, there is one persistent message that everyone who comes in contact with me will receive. It’s the first—and most powerful—message I deliver.
What is that message? You guessed it… My attitude.
MORE THAN WORDS
Now, let me say that attitude certainly can be communicated through words. Everyone can choose to use words that lift up, encourage, and express a positive vision. And those words make a big difference in how the rest of the conversation or message is received. But it’s very important to remember that before we can ever say a word, our internal attitude is communicating something. And the message it sends is louder than any words we might choose.
And how does it communicate, if not through words? Through body language and facial expressions. If you walk into the office and slam the door, you’re communicating your attitude. The moment you walk into the house and slump on the couch, you’re communicating your attitude. And if you step up to a podium and with a scowl on your face, you’re communicating your attitude.
And in each situation, people are receiving your message loud and clear.
IT ALWAYS STARTS ON THE INSIDE
Now, this post is not about just making changes to how you carry yourself, or about pasting on a smile in order to appear happy. Those are superficial changes, and even if they fool others for a short while, your real attitude always eventually shows through.
The message I want to emphasize is the one that I shared last week: Attitude is a choice. Choosing a positive attitude is not always easy. And sometimes we’re tempted to just let a negative attitude flow. But when we do, it will show on the outside. And it will have an effect on our interaction with others.
An advisor to President Lincoln once suggested a certain candidate for the Lincoln cabinet. Lincoln rejected the recommendation, saying, “I don’t like the man’s face.”
“But sir,” said the advisor, “surely he can’t be responsible for his face.”
“Every man over forty is responsible for his face,” Lincoln replied.
The same is true for all of us, and it really applies at any age. I’m responsible for my face. And you’re responsible for yours. You choose your message when you choose your attitude. Choose a positive one, and your interactions are more likely to be positive. Your most persistent message is the one you choose to have in your heart and wear on your face.
Make it a good one.
John Maxwell grew up in the 1950s in the small Midwestern city of Circleville, Ohio. John's earliest childhood memory is of knowing that he would someday be a pastor. He professed faith in Christ at the age of three, and reaffirmed that commitment when he was 13. At age 17, John began preparing for the ministry. He attended Circleville Bible College, earning his bachelor's degree in 1969. In June of that same year, he married his sweetheart, Margaret, and moved to tiny Hillham, Indiana, where he began his first pastorate.
While serving in his second church, Maxwell began to study the correlation between leadership effectiveness and ministry effectiveness. On July 4, 1976, while preaching at a service commemorating America's bicentennial, John sensed that God was calling him into a ministry to pastors. Within days after that event, pastors began to contact him, asking for his assistance in nurturing their churches. Over the next four years, on an informal basis, John helped scores of fellow pastors. Then, in 1980, he was asked to become Executive Director of Evangelism for the Wesleyan denomination.
Though his time at Wesleyan headquarters was productive, John soon realized that his deeper desire was to help pastors from numerous denominations. He knew that desire would be unfulfilled if he were to stay at denominational headquarters. As a result, in 1981 John accepted the call to return to the pastorate, this time at Skyline Wesleyan Church in the San Diego, California area. But he did so with the church's blessing to pursue his vision. The Skyline congregation allowed him to continue mentoring and assisting pastors even as he led them to new levels.
In 1985, as he continued to equip and encourage other pastors, John took the next crucial step in leadership development. He founded a new company called INJOY and created the INJOY Life Club, featuring a monthly tape for leaders. The fledging operation, established in the corner of a garage, was soon bursting at the seams. The INJOY Life Club tapes were received with great enthusiasm, and the number of subscriptions quickly increased from hundreds to thousands. Simultaneously, the demand for other resources and seminars exploded. Pastors from coast to coast were responding, and their desire for help was even greater than John had anticipated.
As the years passed, INJOY began demanding more and more of John's time. In 1995, he resigned from his position as senior pastor at Skyline following a very fruitful 14-year tenure. The church had tripled in size and its lay ministry involvement had increased ten-fold. Dr. Maxwell is in great demand today as a speaker. Through his bestselling books, audio and video resources, and major conferences, he communicates directly with more than one million people every year. He is frequently asked to speak for organizations such as Promise Keepers and Focus on the Family, but his greatest joy and desire is to help pastors become better leaders.
Because the need for leadership development knows no borders, John established EQUIP, a non-profit organization which trains leaders in urban communities, academic institutions, and within international organizations. EQUIP is also spearheading a movement which has enlisted more than one million pastoral prayer partners who covenant to pray specifically for those who shepherd God's flock.
John continues to seek new opportunities to help churches and church leaders. He knows that one thing is constant: the only hope for the world is salvation through the Lord Jesus Christ, who gives life abundantly.