“But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, longsuffering, gentleness, faith, meekness, temperance [self-control]; against such there is no law” (Gal. 5:22-23).
One of the wonderful benefits of knowing God and mediating on His Word is finding out that you can have a happy marriage. People go to marriage counselors and that is fine. They go to marriage seminars and that is wonderful.
Some even write Ann Landers. But you can find out what you need to know by reading the Word of God and developing a love for Him. The closer you get to God, the better wife or husband you will be.
Be A Delightful Partner
Spending time in fellowship and praise daily will perfect those things that pertain to life and godliness in your life and marriage. God will show you how to be a delightful partner to your spouse. He cares about these things. After all, He is the One who started the whole business of marriage.
In Genesis 2:18, we read that God said, “It is not good that man should be alone; I will make him a help meet for him.” God first made the animals and Adam named them, but they did not fulfill the loneliness he felt.
Believe it or not, a dog is not man’s best friend! So, God made a woman for man. Man was not complete until she was made. She is to be his helpmeet.
“Help” means to aid or give assistance to, suitable, qualified, and adaptable. “Meet” means to surround and protect. Therefore, a woman can adapt to any situation, for her makeup is to be understanding. But these qualities in her have to be nurtured.
We have to be trained to be a godly helpmeet. Titus 2:4 says that we have to actually be trained to love our husbands.
You may be thinking, “I do love my husband.” Yes, I am sure you do. But most of the time it is a sensual, soulical love governed by the five physical senses. Agape love, which is unconditional, comes from the recreated spirit, built up and led by the Holy Spirit.
The God-kind of love in found in 1 Corinthians 13:4-7:
Charity [agape] suffereth long, and is kind; charity [agape] envieth not; charity [agape] vaunteth not itself, is not puffed up, Doth not behave itself unseemly, seeketh not her own, is not easily provoked, thinketh no evil; Rejoiceth not in iniquity, but rejoiceth in the truth; Beareth all things, believeth all things, hopeth all things, endureth all things.
I learned these things when I began to study the Word for myself. I did not know the first thing about being a godly helpmeet according to the Word. In fact, I have never heard the words “helpmeet” before!
Unfortunately, there was no preaching on these kinds of things when I was growing up. Thank God things have changed in the last 20 years.
A Change of Mind
I remember the very first time I was given a book on being a godly wife. I started reading it and became disgusted. When it talked about submitting to our husbands, I thought, “Well, what about me? It looks like I’m supposed to do all the doing and the giving.”
So I just pitched the book aside and said, “Forget you.” But I found myself going back to it from time to time. Each time I would read a little more and each time a seed was planted in me. I began to change on the inside.
My will began to line up with God’s will. I was able to change areas in my life that needed to be changed. Changing on the outside pleases man, but it won’t last. Changing on the inside pleases the Father and it will last.
I began to meditate on Galatians 5:22:
But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, longsuffering, gentleness, goodness, faith.
Then I allowed the fruit of the Spirit to grow in my life.
Also at this time, I was spending much time studying the Word, wanting to be a vessel pleasing to God and fit for His use. Therefore, being a doer of the Word included being a godly helpmeet. I began to line myself up according to the divine order of God for our household. We had a good marriage before, but now it is great!
That doesn’t mean our marriage is perfect, because people are not perfect. But our responsibility is to understand on another. Through the years, I have learned that most problems in a marriage arise from misunderstandings rather than selfishness.
When you walk in love and forgiveness, giving of yourself to one another, God will honor and bless your marriage.
by Jeanne Caldwell
Excerpt permission granted by Harrison House Publishers
Pastor Emeritus, founders and pastors of Agape Church from its founding in 1979 to 2014. Happy and Jeanne Caldwell.
In 1979 God spoke to Happy & Jeanne Caldwell to build a spiritual production center in Little Rock, in order to take the good news of Jesus Christ to the city, state, nation and world. Together, they founded Agape Church, a strong spirit-filled body of believers. Through a deep sensitivity to the Spirit of God, and anointed teaching - the lost are saved, the sick healed, and thousands have been blessed.
In 1988 Happy and Jeanne answered a direct call from the Lord to take His message beyond Central Arkansas. They founded VTN - the Victory Television Network. This network of 3 full power TV stations is carried on over 200 cable systems and is bringing the Gospel into more than 1.2 million households.
Through his own daily program, Arkansas Alive, and Sunday program, Happy Caldwell, Happy presents the Word in profound simplicity, making the character of God a revelation to those who hear. His ministry is known for instilling Christian principles in strategic leadership. He was honored for this in 2005 with an invitation to participate in the US Army War College Strategic Leader Staff Ride at Gettysburg, PA.
Happy Caldwell is a recipient of the Peter J. Daniels Caleb Encourager Award, which has been bestowed upon such notable names as Norman Vincent Peale, Nelson Mandela and Dr. Oral Roberts. He has been recognized by the Arkansas Martin Luther King Jr. Commission with The Salute to Greatness Community Service Award. He also serves on the Executive Board for Christians United for Israel, and is a Regional Director for CUFI.
Jeanne's ministry transcends nationality, race, culture, and generation as her passion to see women transformed into ladies who are pruned, polished, and perfected by the Word of God and her down-to-earth presentation assist others to have a personal encounter with God's Word.
The same life changing anointing that flows through Jeanne's personal ministry is also be appreciated by everyone who hears her anointed CDs or watches her weekly television program, In His Presence. In addition to her music and teaching ministry, Jeanne is the author of Learning to Trust God's Faithfulness, a compelling and effectual account of her life of faith, including her dramatic testimony of God's healing after a car accident left her with a broken back.
Happy and Jeanne Caldwell continue to travel delivering the life-changing message of Jesus Christ in churches, conferences, and on VTN.